“When one is engaged in suffering, there is so much more to
it than keeping it all together”.
This is a quote from Laura van Dernoot Lipsky, founder of
the Trauma Stewardship Institute.
She said this in a TEDx
talk in 2015 titled “Beyond the Cliff.”
Okay.
So.
There is a lot going on.
I get that it can be hard to focus, and hard to know where
our focus is supposed to land. I believe this is by design.
These are things that have been working for me. You are
welcome to try them. You are welcome to mock me for them. Whatever you want to
do, really, but I figured I’d share in case they might help:
I don’t check social
media first thing in the morning: this habit was a hard one to break but it
really, really helps. If I do check it, I check Instagram or Snapchat. It wasn’t
until I made this change that I realized how much it was affecting my entire
day.
I avoid click-baiting
headlines: If the headline doesn’t state exactly what happened, I look for
another news source that tells me exactly what I’m getting into.
I only read one news
story per event: I’ve switched from reading the news as a morbid punishment
and exercise in reinforced depression to information and resource gathering.
There’s a difference between keeping abreast about what’s going on at the
US/Mexican border and listening over and over to the recording of crying
children in camps. Not doing and sharing the latter doesn’t make you “disengaged”
from the news and politics. No matter what your friends who share that meme
that mentions disability in its text yet is COMPLETELY INACCESSIBLE
passive-aggressively imply about you.
I find one thing I
can do: Donating; sending an email, text, or phone call; supporting a local
event. Sometimes this looks like a task or a way I approach a project to focus on a
vulnerable population. Sometimes I feel like the nature of my work helps me process things in a productive way that others might not get to, and I’m
grateful for that.
I don’t read opinion
pieces: I mean I’ll still about library stuff , but
to me it’s enough to know that the terrible things are happening without reading every hot take by Jeff Smith or whoever TF about exactly what
this means for the future, or exactly what scene in the Handmaid’s Tale this
apparently is. Like, get out of here.
I set a time to leave
the Internet: well, you can never REALLY leave the Internet, but I give
myself about an hour with my phone to catch up after work, then I try to leave
it alone. This was also something really hard. The past two weeks, my phone
battery has mostly lasted two full days at a time. My spouse and I have more
quality conversations, and fewer of them involve things we saw on the Internet
that day.
So that’s what I’ve got. Any other tips?
Hang in there. We need you.
Here is my one of my favorite websites, You Feel like Shit. It might help; it
does for me, sometimes.
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